Do you feel that you’re not a confident person?
Do you feel your lack of confidence holds you back from doing what you really want, and achieving your dreams?
What if I were to tell you that confidence is not actually an all-encompassing thing that defines you?
What if I were to tell you that it’s actually a skill that you can hone, develop and master?
In this week’s Make It Happen Monday, I’m sharing with you the fastest way to increase your confidence levels right now!
Watch Episode 74 Here
Read Episode 74 Here
Today, I want to talk about confidence. This comes from a recent discussion with my ten year old daughter (soon to be 11), who is clearly going through a major change in her life as she hurtles towards her teenage years.
We’ve been talking about confidence, and at her age, particularly with girls I find, they start to have self-esteem issues, confidence issues, lack of self-belief, and that feeling of “I’m not quite good enough.”
This has led me to really think about confidence, and what it actually is.
The Common Misconception of Confidence
We incorrectly talk about confidence as if it’s something that defines who we are.
You may not be an extrovert. You may not be that person who walks into a party and is the life and soul.
You may be more of an introvert. This does not mean that you are not confident. It just means you are an introvert as opposed to an extrovert.
Confidence is not forcing yourself to be an extrovert. It’s a skill that can be honed and developed, in the specific area you want to become confident in.
Confidence is a skill, not who you are
Many people will say, “I’m not confident” or “I’m not a confident person.”
My question to that is, “Confident in what?”
What are you not confident in?
There will be things in your life that you are completely confident in.
Let me give you an example. I am not a confident cook. I’m a rubbish cook!
But I am incredibly confident in doing a video like this, and sending it out to thousands of people.
For you, perhaps even the thought of getting yourself on video may scare you silly. But you might be an uber confident cook.
You might be a really confident runner. You might be a really confident parent. You might be really confident at maths, website development, Facebook advertising, or whatever!
The Fastest Way to Increase Your Confidence
Ask yourself, what do you want to become confident in? Then, you need to start developing that skill.
For instance, if you want to become confident at making videos, guess what you need to do? You need to start making videos!
Watching loads of courses on how to make videos is not going to make you more confident at it. You’ll gain knowledge, but not confidence.
Doing it is what gives you confidence.
If, for example, you are a web designer, and you want to sell your services, but you lack confidence in selling.
Guess what you need to spend your days doing? You need to spend your days selling!
There will of course be some areas of your life or business that just don’t interest you and therefore you won’t want to develop confidence in those areas.
These things you can just avoid, or if they are necessary to your business or life, you can go and outsource them to others.
But when there is something that does interest you, and you want to become confident in it, the only way to develop the confidence skill is by doing it.
My daughter loves singing and wants to be a singer. But she’s not confident on stage. So guess what I’m telling her to do right now. Get on stage! Make it happen!
Confidence is Like a Muscle. It Needs to be Exercised.
A few episodes ago, I talked about learning by doing.
Well, gaining confidence is also by doing. Can you see a pattern here? Action is the key!
I want you to eradicate ‘I’m not confident’ from your vocabulary. From now on, it does not exist.
Instead, change this statement to ‘I don’t feel confident in (whatever skill you want to learn).’
Now you know what skill you need to develop with immediate effect!
Move beyond your comfort zone, beyond your fears, and start developing that skill right now so that you can become uber confident in that particular area of your life or business.
What Else Can I Do?
See the comments below? Let me know what you don’t feel confident in. Write, “I don’t feel confident in…..” and tell me what it is.
Also, please share with your friends if you think this Make It Happen Monday episode has been useful and of course have an amazing week, live life on purpose and Make It Happen.
Thanks for watching. Jo :)